There are days like today that there’s just not enough duct tape to hold the pieces of my head together.
Here’s something for major news outlets for your reporting down the road:
THIS KIND OF STORY IS NOT UNIQUE TO WEST VIRGINIA.
(This is also NOT UNIQUE in Kentucky, Alabama, Mississippi, Missouri, Kansas, Florida, Ohio, Virginia or about 41 other states.)
Let me do a little back reporting for you, guys. Two perfectly normal white guys (note: by saying “normal white guys” I’m not implying that black people are NOT normal or different or anything — I know you’re ready to jump on that) got WAXED in both 2000 and 2004. You know why? Voters basically got told the Democrats would take away their guns. (You don’t do that in a state like West Virginia. It’s also very bad to steal JoBoo’s rum.)
Here’s the thing you all don’t know, or you choose to ignore: West Virginia’s Democrats are largely Democrats in name only. The state (by and large) is controlled by various unions and special interest groups and all of that who throw the label “Democrat” on their candidate and tell you anybody Republican is just simply evil. Most labor unions in the state just encourage you to vote straight ticket and not even think about it. (This would be why about 40 percent of West Virginia’s House of Delegates is filled with absolute self-motivated morons who have no business being the representative of their cul-de-sac, much less many, many residents.)
West Virginia’s residents are conservative by nature, and yes, they do love their God and guns. The only reason Democrats got a free ride in this place was largely because of people being too uneducated to actually research the issues and vote with the candidate they choose. Now, would that have always been the Republican? No. It wouldn’t. I’ve never, ever voted a straight ticket in my life and I never will. (Such is the hell of the Libertarian.) What’s happening now isn’t racism. It’s just the state’s overall realization that, “Hey!! We don’t like those liberal hippie babykilling socialists.” (Note: This is 100 PERCENT NOT how I feel. I’m just paraphrasing.)
When I see stories like this, again, I just feel cheated. I feel like I’ve eaten this cereal all the way to the bottom of the box and they forgot the toy. Would I be lying to you if I said I know there are people in West Virginia who will vote for John McCain strictly because he’s white? No. There are plenty of them. Would I be lying to you if I said there weren’t West Virginians laboring under the delusion that Barack Obama is Muslim? No. Again, there are plenty of them.
But there are plenty of them in every state. And it gets so tiresome and overdone to be this country’s beaten-down red-headed stepchild and I don’t even live there anymore. I had to leave to find the kind of opportunity I wanted and I’m fine with that. It’s not the state’s fault that I felt it had nothing left to offer me. But it just gets under my skin to see the national media do these kinds of stories. We’re not your little novelty project.
(Exit soapbox, stage left.)