22
Jul
08

Today, we salute you, “Mr. Shoot First”

I bet you wish you didn\'t put this on MySpace.

I bet you wish you didn't put this on MySpace.

I swear, I find a new reason to be homesick every week …

From today’s Charleston Daily Mail:

Police searching for man shot while trying to steal friend’s beer

CROSS LANES — Police are looking for a Cross Lanes man who was shot while he was allegedly trying to steal beer from a relative’s refrigerator.

Kanawha County sheriff’s deputies were called to 130 Relation Road about 3 a.m. Tuesday after a reported shooting, according to a press release from Lt. Sean Crosier.

Critters get real protective about their Beast. Especially if it’s getting close to the end of the month.

This helps reinforce two things in my mind:

1. Nothing good — ever — happens between midnight and 5 a.m.
2. West Virginians are by and large responsible for their own stereotypes — and I say this as a native West Virginian. (Albeit, a native West Virginian who has never shot a family member over Coors Light.)

… Sigh.

Again, though, that stuff happens here every day. In D.C., we kill you for a lot less than cheap beer out of your uncle’s fridge.

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